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Mr. Botherit is an idiot.
So begins The Year of Secret Assignments by Jaclyn Moriarty, a simple book about three girls (Lydia, Emily, Cassie) writing to three boys (Sebastian, Charlie, and Matthew, respectively.) Oh, except there are the aforementioned secret assignments, along with prank calls and falsely-pulled fire alarms and cars getting broken into.
- Broken Record: Emily's third letter to Charlie:
You talk a pile of crap. You talk a pile of crap.
- Celeb Crush: Emily asks Cass what her ideal way of being asked out is:
Cass says that her ideal way would be for the guy to be Brad Pitt and he can just call her up and ask.
- Disappeared Dad: Cassie's dad died a year before the start of the novel.
- Imaginary Friend: For a while, Emily and Lydia think Cassie's pen pal is one of these.
- Jerkass: Matthew Dunlop, aka Paul Wilson.
- Malaproper: Emily. Charlie even calls her out on it a few times, though no one else does.
Emily: The ladies seem to really go for Lydia's dad (Justice Oberman). They love him! :) I have heard tell (from Lydia's mother) that Justice Oberman's name was once a cinnamon for sex god.
- "The Reason You Suck" Speech: Matthew/Paul gives one to Cassie a little before Winter Term.
- Trademark Favorite Food: Emily loves chocolate so much that her nickname is Toblerone.
Emily: I think it is an angiogram of Thompson, actually.