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"Edward is possibly the most maligned character in Final Fantasy, with the possible exceptions of maybe Quina and "Jar Jar" Wakka. I don't see how anybody could have thought Edward might be a hit. "Okay," someone at Squaresoft must have said at a developers' meeting, "Final Fantasy IIs weakest character was Gordon, and Final Fantasy IIIs most useless class was the Bard. You know what I think would be a good idea? COMBINING THEM."
"Finally, and most annoyingly, we have Chewbacca's son, Lumpy. You will soon learn to hate Lumpy. You'll hate him when he smiles, you'll hate him when he looks sad, you'll hate him when he growls, and you'll hate him when he watches his holographic Cirque de Soleil gymnasts. On an annoyance scale, think of Jar Jar Binks and every single Ewok rolled into one, then multiply that nightmare by 3,720. I mean, seriously - just look at him. Tell me you have ever, in your life, wanted to set fire to something more."
Spoony: "There's just something about this game, something irrational, something instinctive that when I see [Tidus], I just wanna punch this motherfucker! This sissy shorts-wearing fucking bat-faced Leonardo DiCaprio-looking jagoff, fuck this guy! Fuck him and his leather lederhosen! I hate his fucking faggy Meg Ryan hair! I hate his smug, fucking hideous Arch Hall Jr face! I hate his stupid, girly, banana-coloured half-vest! I hate his stupid, squeaky, nasal fucking voice!"Spoony: "And every time he opens his big fucking mouth I just wanna stab him in the throat with an ice pick just to watch him die! I HATE HIM! I HATE YOU! I HATE THIS GAME! AAAAAAARGH!"
Tidus: "A-HA-HA-HA-HA-HA! A-HA-HA-HA-HA!"
"I hate that frog!"—Wolf O'Donnell, Star Fox Asault (Slippy)
No, she didn't miss you, you idiot! She doesn't give a shit about you! In fact, NO one gives a shit about you! Hell, people like Shippo more than you.
"SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP I HATE YOU. Okay, got that out of my system. Much is Robin’s brother in this telling. A wise choice, as that’s the only possible explanation for why they’d keep someone this incompetent around for as long as they do, instead of leading him to a quiet spot in the woods, taking out their bows, and telling him about the rabbits. I’m not exaggerating. In one episode, Will idly refers to him as a ‘half-wit’, and he gets angry, pointing out that he may be a little slow on the uptake, but he’s no half-wit. And here I was thinking half was too generous. He’s also useless in a fight, usually getting backed into a corner and screaming for Robin or Nasir or someone to come save him. He falls asleep on guard duty, he lets prisoners escape, he gets captured 5 or 6 times in 24 episodes… I’d think that living in the woods as outlaws, having a dullard like him around would present a liability. But no, apparently survival is less important than having a mascot. Here’s a great illustration of his pointlessness. In the episode “The Betrayal”, a number of King John’s personal guard dress up as the outlaws and wreak havoc among the villages. There’s a fake Will, a fake John, a fake Tuck, a fake Nasir, and a fake Robin. Notice anything missing? Yeah, he’s so useless, he’s not even worth discrediting."
"Oh my god, I hate this little turd. This was Scooby Doo's...I don't know, nephew? Cousin? Weekend son? I have no idea, but he was annoying as hell. He would always act tough and rush into situations thinking he could save the day. But of course, he's the size of an 8-ball, so physical violence is probably not going to help you here. Naturally, Shaggy and Scooby had to go in rescue him every time he'd throw himself into peril. Yeah, you're making these guys look brave! His voice was annoying, the character was annoying, the fact that he never shuts up was annoying, GOD HE WAS ANNOYING!! If I ever see a dog like him crossing the street, I'm stepping on the gas, because the sooner I can eradicate this little bitch from being anybody else's problem, the better."
‘Cause you identify with them, you're with them all the way! "Go Shaggy! Go Scooby!" The rest of the guys who drive the van, "Fuck off!" Scrappy Doo, a Magnum...—Eddie Izzard, Glorious
But no matter who you choose, you probably wind up wanting to kill these annoying little elf things that carry your magic refills. Yes, they serve a purpose. Yes, they're supposed to be cute. That doesn't stop from being the most irritating helpers this side of the dog in Duck Hunt.
"You might have noticed that cartoons had a different idea what was comic relief than other media. Cartoon comic relief people aren't like the fat guy in the spring break movie that'll eat anything, get stuck in doorways, and win the water skiing competition with a perfectly timed fart. Comic relief in cartoons didn't make you laugh. They were just a couple people that we hated more than anyone else."