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"I am Jerry and I am a prayer warrior. I am a servent of the lord and will do anything to get rid of evil Gods. Lately the Satanic leader Percy Jackson has taken over much of the land, along with his Satanic Army and his girlfriend whore. She has sex with other people just to get Satanic money."
—The first paragraph of The Evil Gods I (ignoring the author's note and random biblical quote). It Got Worse after that.

The Prayer Warriors is a series of fanfics written by Thomas Brown, known as BelieverInChrist, and his cousin Ebony Brown.

The plot has the titular heroes trying to purify the worlds they're on, whether by converting them or killing them because they're Satanic. However, they also face dangers along the way, whether by facing off against other Gods or other powerful beings.

So far, seven stories of The Prayer Warriors have been written:

The Prayer Warriors has also spawned several copy-cat fanfics:

You can see the Author's page, which Noah has now hijacked, here and his cousin's page here. Thomas Brown also has a Twitter, but he hasn't tweeted in a long time. Arcadiarika has liveblogged Thomas' six stories after saying on the third and fourth liveblogs that she's done reviewing the entire series; you can read them here, here, here, here, and here. BookObsesserNumberOne has written commentaries on these fanfics; you can read them here and here. Taylor Ashmere has liveblogged Ebony Brown's Prayer Ponies; you can read it here

Compare Harry Potter turns to the Lord and Starkits Prophecy. Contrast My Immortal, Naruto Veangance Revelaitons, (both of which could be considered this fic's Mirror Universe counterparts) and Gurren Jesus.

The Prayer Warriors series provides examples for the following tropes:


The Evil Gods I

  • Anticlimax: Percy suddenly deciding to convert instead of finishing Jerry off, and our heroes killing Hades instantly by praying.
  • Bury Your Gays: The heroes murder two lesbians in Aphrodite's temple.
  • Dirty Coward: What does Jerry do when the bad guys accidentally tell him that The Mole is going to kill him? Run and hide in the next town, leaving his friends and pregnant wife behind to potentially get killed instead.
  • Double Standard: Good Girls Avoid Abortion, because aborting a fetus is wrong. Except in Osama Bin Laden's case, as his mother should have aborted him. Also, it's perfectly okay to "abort" innocent adults and teenagers, especially if they're not Christian.
  • Good Girls Avoid Abortion: Naturally, Mary does this when she decides not to keep her baby.
  • Gratuitous Rape: The random rape scene in a god's temple.
  • Honor-Related Abuse: When Jerry is told that Mary cheated on him with Percy, he immediately kills her without even considering if it might be true or not.
  • It's Not Rape If You Enjoyed It: The heroes come across a girl being raped while steamrolling across Camp Half-Blood. She's screaming, which means she isn't enjoying it–which is lucky for her, or else she would have been convicted of adultery and stoned to death.
  • No Except Yes: From Chapter 1: "I and her are not dating, if you Satanic scum think that there is something Satanic going on. We are dating, but we are not having Sex until we get married."
  • Ten Little Murder Victims: After shooing away Percy, Jerry realizes there's a mole in his midst and goes searching for it...when he's not screwing around, that is.

The Battle with the Witches

Threat of Satanic Commonism

  • Anachronism Stew: The constant anachronistic battle scenes that seem like bastardized versions of The Iliad and The Odyssey tend to induce this. Chariots and bronze breastplates are apparently standard military issue... in 1917 Russia. For even more weirdness, at one point, Clarisse tries to get a fallen Soviet's weapon "because he had a good gun" [1].
  • Anticlimax: Mary points a gun to Lennon at the end of Chapter 11. Chapter 12 picks up with the Prayer Warriors burning the coliseum to the ground, revealing then and there that Lennon was killed.
  • Artistic License History: Apparently, Soviet Russia was ruled by John Lennon.
  • Dirty Commonists
  • Gender Flip: Rika and Books are presented as male.
  • Gratuitous Rape: The extremely pointless scene where a rapist comes right the fuck out of nowhere.
  • Heel Face Turn: Josef Stalin, of all people! After being beaten by the Prayer Warriors in Threat of Satanic Commonism, he decides Being Evil Sucks, and that he will allow complete freedom of religion. The Prayer Warriors kill him anyway, as they don't like that idea.
  • Hitler's Time Travel Exemption Act: Averted. The Prayer Warriors get rid of both Lennon-er, Lenin AND Stalin.
  • Honor-Related Abuse: A man comes out of nowhere and suddenly rapes Ebony. Percy kills her because she is Defiled Forever. Of course, this death doesn't stick, making the whole scene pointless.
  • "I Know You're in There Somewhere" Fight: Jerry vs. a Stalin-controlled Grover.
  • Just Trying to Help: Stalin's last words.
  • No-Holds-Barred Beatdown: Rika delivers one to Jerry before he gets killed. Bizarre, considering that all other representations and villains get the opposite treatment.
    • At least, we assume that's what happened. For some reason, the whole battle with Rika is in complete gibberish.
  • Take That, Critics!: This fic is especially bad about it, because it has Benry killed twice, then Idiosy, and it includes two new representations: those of BookObsesserNumberOne, there called "Books", and the aforementioned Arcadiarika, there called "Rika". What's even weirder about this is that Rika is the only character who doesn't suffer a quick death, ending up killed at the end of Chapter 16.
  • Voodoo Shark: Toward the end, the author attempts to explain the reason that Grover keeps coming back: scientists keep cloning him. Of course, the reason why the other characters also come back remains a mystery.
  • X Meets Y: Satanic Commonism: Jack's Iliad of Singularity.
  • Your Head Asplode: When Benry is shot in the head with a sniper rifle, his "head blows up and blood goes everywhere."

The Evil Gods II

 "Evil laugh!" said the vampire.

The Titans Strike Back

The Prayer Ponies


  1. a Call of Duty reference?
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