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For the funny moments in most of the other Muppet movies and TV programming, visit their respective pages.
- The post-Henson tribute has one within the first three minutes; as the Muppets try to figure out who Jim was, they quite suddenly break the fourth wall .
Robin: Hey, I remember this Jim Henson fella! Yeah, he was always hangin' around!
Fozzie: Where? Where?
Robin: [Motions toward the Muppeteers below] Uh... down there.
[All the Muppets gasp upon seeing their own Muppeteers]
Clifford: Hey, who are those guys?!
Robin: I dunno, but they're still following us around...
Gonzo: Hey, hey, look, look -- when we move, they move! Try it!
[They move randomly, watching their Muppeteers move with them]
Fozzie Stop, stop, stop, stop! Let's stop looking at them, even, it's too weird.
- Kermit and Piggy's response to Fox News' claim that the Muppets push a liberal agenda. Kermit points out that they drive around in a gas-guzzling Rolls-Royce... and Piggy says it's as laughable as Fox News claiming that they're news.
- An ad for Cravendale Milk’s offer on a Kermit backpack has Kermit showing off the item to Pepe, to which the king prawn replies...
Pepe: "I've got a magic potato, okay." **PEPE PULLS OUT A POTATO THAT MAGICALLY FLOATS ABOVE HIS HAND**
- All the spoof trailers, but especially the one that makes it out to be a typical cheesy romantic comedy, until they start listing the cast..."This movie has Muppets in it?!"
- The original songs contain awkward or out-of-place lyrics that fans of Flight of the Conchords will be familiar with.
Mary: It's never me and him. It's always me and him... and him!
- Only Gonzo would give his plumbing factory a Self-Destruct Mechanism. Triggered by a Big Red Button. Labeled, "Automatic Destroy Plumbing Business Button."
Fozzie: That looked like an expensive explosion. I can't believe we had that in the budget.
- Even better, the explosion is completely offscreen, indicating they didn't have the budget for it.
- Fart shoes.
- Mary and her fixation on wishing Gary would propose to her after 10 years together. She's so completely dramatic about it.
- During the "Man Or A Muppet" number, Gary and Walter sing about being at the crossroads of their lives and about how they need to choose whether they're "men or Muppets." In Gary's reflection, there is a Muppet version of him. In Walter's reflection, the audience expects to see the human version of him played by a live actor, and, apparently, get... Jim Parsons.
- "Muppet Man."
Miss Piggy: (triple-headdesk) I can't believe I fell for "Muppet Man!"
- When Rowlf complains that he wasn't included in the Time Compression Montage, we see what he was doing: Taking a nap in a hammock.
Kermit: Hey. You wanna get back together?
- And immediately after:
Rowlf: Ha ha ha... classic.
- The credits sequence has Kermit and Miss Piggy taking time to step out of the limelight; more specifically, how it gets on the news.
Miss Piggy: "I'm so happy for us, Kermie! Let's share our happiness with the top 10 news publications!"
- The first, second and third most important things to be happy in life are children, ice cream, and laughter.
- Tex Richman does a rap. No, really. And it's actually good!
Tex Richman: My answer is no.
Kermit: Well, you could have just said that.
- And it's a sing-along. With a bouncing ball!
- With Las Vegas dancers for a chorus!
- The Barber Shop Quartet scene where Beaker pops up with an axe, and the rest of the Muppets just stare at him awkwardly. The song they're doing is Nirvana's "Smells Like Teen Spirit". That was great, when they hold up towels with the lyrics Beaker's says "MEE MEE MEE MO" on it.
- Scooter, who has never hosted anything before in his life, having to MC for Kermit when Kermit needs to go out for an emergency! Kermit advises him to do just what he does every time he's hosting: Imagine the Audience Naked.
Scooter: (stuttering and nervous) Y-y-y-y-YOU'RE ALL NAKED. (cut to shot of the audience in boxers and tank tops) ...well, almost.
- Scooter introduced acts in the original show on occasion without a beat. He was probably nervous here because he hasn't done anything like that in decades and felt out of practice.
- Beauregard has apparently been cleaning one closet of the Muppet Theater the entire time since the show ended, and never realized they all left!
- Walter's epic scream montage.
- In the TV spot, Mary asked Gary if they could go grab lunch while waiting for Walter to silence.
- Any montage scene that takes place.
- 80's Robot. That is all.
- Especially when he looks up where Fozzie is with his modem... which promptly loudly screeches and tortures everyone in the car.
- "Would you like some Tab or New Coke?"
- "Not now, 80s Robot."
- Crazy Harry being so out of practice he blew himself up instead of the dynamite.
- Jack Black who spends his appearance on the telethon tied to a chair.
- Especially the Barbershop Quartet number where he's both unhappy it's a barbershop quartet but actually starts complaining when they perform "Smells Like Teen Spirit"
Jack Black: You're ruining one of the greatest songs of all time!
- And then they shrink his head.
- Also right after the Muppets kidnap him
Piggy:You inspire them, Kermie.
Kermit: I inspire them to kidnap people!?
Piggy: To work together!
Kermit: To kidnap people!?
- Punch Teacher. Especially the executives wondering why they were being sued over it.
- The Swedish Chef's lyrics in the sentimental "Pictures In My Head": complete gibberish slotted into an otherwise serious song with subtitles containing Latin, crossed-out "O"s!
- The Muppets' initial audience being a single hobo named Hobo Joe and his fire, as well as Joe's vocal displeasure at the Muppets saying there's no one in the audience, as well as some of his friends joining him and carrying Jack Black off as their king at the end.
- "Travel by map."
- Neil Patrick Harris in the telethon box. "No, I don't know why I'm not hosting this."
- Kermit's reaction to Whoopi Goldberg, Selena Gomez and ... some random kid (actually Modern Family star Rico Rodriguez) entering the telethon.
- As well as Selena and Rico having no idea who the Muppets are.
Selena: I don't know why I'm here. My travel agent just told me to come.
Rico: Are you one of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?
- Kermit's subsequent deadpan answer sells it:
"...yes I am ...now here's how you can help!"
- As Miss Piggy prepares the kidnapping of Jack Black
Jack Black: Oh hey Animal. What are you doing here.
three second pause
- During the cleaning montage, the Swedish Chef finds the refrigerator filled with mold and filth... some of it moving. What does our favorite Muppet Chef do? Why, use a flamethrower to clean out the filth, of course.
Swedish Chef: Seehurloodurrmurrleedlefrind!
- The Suspiciously Specific Denial about Tex Richman's Heel Face Turn.
- The song "Me Party," mainly because of the restaurant patrons' complete and total obliviousness to Mary's song and dance.
- Piggy sings this with a table of talking Muppet food in her dressing room including a lot of pastries. Why is the food there? 1.) Because she's lonely, and 2.) she's a pig!
- The ending of "Life's a Happy Song," where, as soon as Gary, Mary, and Walter leave on the bus, the crowd lets out a relieved "They're gone!" and collapses.
- Also during this song we get Willie Nelson singing "Life is full of Highs" and a couple of other people singing that "Life is a fillet of fish" to which Walter and Gary can only reply with... "Yes, yes it is".
- Walter tells Kermit that he gave people the greatest gift in the world...
Walter: Uh, no, the one after that.
Kermit: Ice cream?
Walter: No, the other one.
Walter: [Excitedly] YES, LAUGHTER! THE THIRD GREATEST GIFT YOU CAN GIVE SOMEONE!
- After you watch the telethon, you realize that it's very much exactly like how a regular episode of The Muppet Show would play out, save maybe for Jack Black being tied to a chair and doing nothing but complaining, and the money counter hanging throughout! It takes up nearly the same amount of time as a regular episode in the course of the film too, even though in-universe, it takes up two hours!
Jack Black: I'm being held captive by these weirdos!
Statler: Now you know how we've felt for the past forty years!
- "Maniacal laugh!"
- "MANIACAL LAUGH!"
- At the end, Gary finally proposes to Mary and she replies:
- When Gary, Mary, and Walter start looking for Kermit:
Mary: How do we find Kermit? Nobody's seen him in years.
(the gang passes a man selling Hot Star Maps in front of Pink's Hot Dogs)
Walter: (gasps) Wait, stop the car! I have an idea.
(cut to the trio eating some chili dogs)
Gary: These are delicious! Great idea, Walter.
- According to the commentary, this was the first scene written.