|YMMV • Radar • Quotes • (Funny • Heartwarming • Awesome) • Fridge • Characters • Fanfic Recs • Nightmare Fuel • Shout Out • Plot • Tear Jerker • Headscratchers • Trivia • WMG • Recap • Ho Yay • Image Links • Memes • Haiku • Laconic|
"Some people play tennis. I erode the human soul."
The wordy, intellectual, and cynical half of the Penny Arcade duo, when the characters of Gabe and Tycho first diverged Tycho was something of the Straight Man to Gabe's more wild enthusiasm. However, he quickly developed into a character as strange if not stranger. Tycho is known for his love of literature and wordplay, his overwritten fantasy series Epic Legends of the Hierarchs: The Elemenstor Saga, his *ahem* love of animals, and his deep knowledge of horrors that man was not meant to know.
- Author Avatar: For Jerry Holkins, but was not originally intended as such.
- Deadpan Snarker
- Fetish: Has expressed attraction to numerous things: giraffes, jellyfish, and whatever's at ColdTurkeys.com. More specifically, he's said he's attracted to long, slender necks, of the sort you can't usually find on humans.
- Flat Earth Atheist: A noted atheist... despite the fact that Jesus Christ plays Mario Kart with Gabe regularly.
- Hilariously Abusive Childhood
- Humanoid Abomination: Maybe, maybe not. He seems to enjoy cultivating that appearance, and his eyes subtly glow red when he's particularly angry, not to mention his infamously disturbing speech in "I Hope You Like Text"...
- Killer Game Master: Attempting to impart his wisdom onto Gabe, nonetheless.
- Though it turns out he hasn't actually run a game since junior high because of his Killer Game Master reputation.
- Named After Somebody Famous: Tycho Brahe was also a 16th century Danish astronomer.
- Nightmare Fetishist: God yes. He longs for the day when games include Starfish Aliens and Eldritch Abominations as romance options.
- Oh, and we're not told what his heart's desire is... just that acquiring it would be enough to damn Jesus to hell.
- Red Eyes, Take Warning: His eyes turn red when he gets really angry. He may be an Eldritch Abomination of some sort...
- Sesquipedalian Loquaciousness: Frequent. In the Penny Arcade card game, there is an attack of his that deals damage based on the number of letters in a given card.
Johnathan "Gabe" Gabriel
"I don’t know why they call them “Chip Clips.” I mean, everyone just puts ‘em on their wang. Why don’t they just call them “Wang Clips” or “Wang Hangers” or something?"
The idealistic, immature, and scatterbrained half of the duo, Gabe's enthusiasm and inability to think things through makes him the perfect Wise Guy to Tycho's straight man, though these roles are often reversed as he possesses a degree of common sense that Tycho lacks. Obsessed with immature humour, male genitalia (mostly his own), and Star Wars, he harbors homosexual tendencies, not so much repressed as simply unrealized and usually centering around Spider-Man. He is independently wealthy from his Doctor Raven Darktalon Blood series.
- Author Avatar: For Mike Krahulik, but was not originally intended as such.
- Ax Crazy
- The Beast Master: A pet dragon, unicorn, and several Pokemon to his name. And his roster may grow at any time...
- Bi the Way: Arguable. His fantasies about Spider-Man and Patrick Swayze tend to point this way.
- Bunny Ears Lawyer: Legal representative for France. It... didn't go well.
- Crouching Moron, Hidden Badass: The Cardboard Tube Samurai IS Gabe. Therefore he can slice things up with a perfectly round tube. He can actually cause nosebleeds by hating someone, which MAY be caused by the fact that Darth Vader might be his dad. Oh, and he got a blood infusion from Spider-Man. Hell, in the very first comic, he gained psychic powers.
- Hidden Depths: Very seriously into Country-Western dancing.
- Game Master: "Your party stands before the Cave of Tits."
- Glass Eye: Lost his original in a Warcraft-related scuffle.
- Keet: Though rather more rude and crude than normal.
- Psychopathic Manchild
Anne Claire "Annarchy" Brahe
Tycho's young niece who shares her uncle's intellect and love of gaming, but only a little of his depravity. Despite her age, she played Final Fantasy on the Famicom... in the original Japanese. Is not to be trifled with.
- Badass Adorable: There's a reason her online handle is Annarchy.
- Bare Your Midriff: In the earlier strips.
- Covert Pervert
- Ensemble Darkhorse
- Granola Girl
- Little Miss Badass
- Little Miss Snarker
The Fruit Fucker 2000
A small robotic juicer that works by having violent sexual intercourse with pieces of fruit.
- Black Comedy Rape: Gabe has described it as "a literal rapist", although its only actual victims have been oranges and zombies so far. It has been shown acting... creepily towards the protagonists' wives, however.
- Humongous Mecha: Fruit Fucker Prime.
- Let's Get Dangerous: Can, if necessary, activate Code Omega. We don't see what this entails, but it's enough to turn a horde of zombies into chunky salsa.
- Memetic Molester
Orignally known as Chuck, an anti-Apple strawman, he had a great fall and was retooled as the hipper Charles. Lives across from Gabe and Tycho and occasionally visits to talk about Apple-based matters.