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File:Gutterballs 3098.jpg


  Heads will bowl.

Joey: Hey, shit nuts. Your fucking waxer ruined my ball. It's yours now. I want a new one.

Egerton: Alright, first of all, shit-for brains, that area's being remodeled. You ain't even supposed to be over there. And secondly, you're a fucking dip shit. It looks to me like you just pressed down too goddamned hard. You're supposed to let that machine do all the work. I don't see it as a malfunction at the junction boy.

Joey: Maybe you should open your fucking eyes then, idiot. There's one inch of sharp screw embedded in the bottom. It's fucked. End of story. Now go get me a new fucking ball.

Egerton: Use one of the balls by your lane.

Joey: Those balls are shitty and used, just like your fucking underwear. Now go get me a goddamned new ball!

Egerton: Hey, calm down now. Don't get your panties in a bunch. Now you be a good boy and go back over to your lane and maybe I'll go over to the store and get you something brand-spanking new. If you're lucky.

Joey: Lucky? You wanna talk about luck? You're fucking lucky the toilet wouldn't flush when your mom spread her legs and pulled you out with a goddamned coat hanger!

Egerton: You're lucky the buffalo beat me over the fence, otherwise I'd be your daddy!
Typical Dialogue

Gutterballs is a 2008 exploitation/slasher film.

It's late night at the Xcalibur bowling center and tensions are running high between two rival teams; one lead by the nasty Steve, and the other featuring a girl named Lisa and her friends.

Following a brawl, the teams are kicked out with the janitor telling everyone they can resume their game tomorrow. Lisa goes back into the bowling alley alone to retrieve her purse, and is the victim of a vicious gang-rape at the hands of Steve and his cronies.

The next night, a masked killer starts to dispatch all parties at the bowling alley, with his kills being counted on the scoreboard as strikes under the name "BBK".


This film provides examples of the following tropes:

  Ben: (while looking over the condom machine) "How about Black Knight? 'For the Big One?' That's for big black cock, that's gonna fall off me for sure."

 Sarah: "Batteries are dead, Jamie, don't you think that's the first thing I would have done?"

Jamie: "Fuck! How convenient..."

  "... I still fucked her... I still... I still... I stilll... I... I still... fucked her."

 Joey: (on the absent Julia and Hannah) "They're probably licking each other clean!"

AJ: (near Spit Take)

 Egerton: "Hey, let me tell you something, boy. Now, back in my day, we-"

AJ: "Ugh, fuck!"

Egerton: Yeah, yeah, yeah, look, back in my day, we kept a score card. Now we had to write everything down methodically. Same with the pins. That pin setter? That used to be a person. Flesh and bone, not a machine. Automation long since took over everything, though."

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