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- "One Man's Struggle To Take It Easy"
- "Bueller? Bueller? Bueller?"
- Sloane's Exaggerated "who, me?" gesture at the nurse (after putting her book away and putting on her coat just as she walks in)
- "ED! Ferris Bueller's on line two!"
- "Pardon my French, but you're an asshole!"
- "You have reached the Coughlin Brother's mortuary. we are DEEPLY sorry we are unable to answer your call, but if you LEEEAVE your name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as is humanly possible."
- The entirety of the art gallery scene. Especially this.
- Jeannie to the intruder (actually Principal Rooney): "Excuse me: if whoever was in this house is still in the house, I'd like you to know that I've just called the police. I'd also like to add that I've got my father's gun and a scorching case of herpes."
- And before that, Jeannie and Rooney think Ferris is in the house, before Jeannie jumps out to catch him and Rooney jumps out and she screams and kicks him in the nose. And then the cutaway scenes while Rooney collapses and Jeannie runs up to her room.
- Talking about Cameron's car.
Ferris: Cameron, I'm sorry, but we can't pick up Sloane in your car. Mr. Rooney would never believe Mr. Peterson drives that piece of shit.
Cameron: It's not a piece of shit.
Ferris: It is a piece of shit. Don't worry about it, I don't even have a piece of shit; I have to envy yours.