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Instead of being angry, a character is morose and disappointed. This usually has a greater effect on the person they are disappointed with.
- Unohana does this, in chapter 35 of Uninvited Guests, when she uses her Team Mom status to guilt trip Soi Fon into surrendering her hold on Soul Society.
With immeasurable sadness in her eyes, she said, "I just want you to know... I'm not angry, Soi Fon. I'm disappointed."
Soi Fon recoiled as if physically struck. "Wh-what... what was..." She muttered. What had just happened? Unohana had done nothing of note; she'd spoken a few words. They weren't even kido. And yet Soi Fon felt as though a spear of ice had been driven deep into her soul, a deep, crushing chill that permeated her entire being.
"I've done so much for you. I work tirelessly, day in and day out, to keep you and your little friends healthy and happy." Unohana said, still sadly. "I do this because I care, Soi, I really do. And to see you respond by treating me like this... it hurts."
Soi Fon fell to her knees. "S... stop it..." She muttered. "What are you... what are you doing to... to me..."
"Look me in the eyes when I talk to you, young lady." Unohana said firmly. "I want you to understand just how much your selfishness has hurt the people who care about you."
"Oh... oh God..." Soi Fon said weakly, tears in her eyes. What was going on? What was this woman doing to her? She hadn't been so much as scratched, but she felt so weak and terrible and... guilty.
Film -- Animated
Mufasa: Simba, I'm very disappointed in you.
Simba: I know.
- In Harry Potter, this is a recurring theme in Harry and Dumbledore's interactions.
- In Harry Potter, Dumbledore is disappointed with Harry for flying the Ford Anglia to Hogwarts -- Harry would rather he had shouted.
- In Harry Potter, when Harry disappoints Dumledore by not making much of an effort to get a memory from Slughorn, he again would have preferred him to yell; "this cold disappointment was worse than anything."
- In Tom Sawyer, there is a passage where Aunt Polly starts crying and berating Tom. He thinks that for a moment, he hoped she'd just beat him.
- One Choose Your Own Adventure Narnia book uses this. Aslan sends the Player Character to investigate an island where some of the water can turn everything it touches to gold, which is otherwise indistingishable from all the other water there. If the hero decides to join a gang exploiting the water to get rich quick, Aslan appears, tells them how disappointed he is, and sends them back home, along with their ill-gotten wealth. The hero's deeply upset, realizing too late the folly of their greed, and it's implied they'll never get a chance to atone or return to Narnia.
- Discussed and subverted in the Buffy the Vampire Slayer episode "All The Way":
Giles: We need to have a conversation.
Dawn: This the part where you tell me you're "not angry, just disappointed"?
Giles: Pretty much. Except for the bit about not being angry.
- And averted by Giles in "Innocence", after Buffy's decision to sleep with Angel releases the evil Angelus, who Buffy (at that point in time) is unable to bring herself to kill.
Buffy: You must be so disappointed in me.
Giles: No. (she looks at him) No, no, I'm not.
Buffy: But this is all my fault.
Giles: No. I don't believe it is. Do you want me to wag my finger at you and tell you that you acted rashly? You did. A-and I can. I know that you loved him. And... he... has proven more than once that he loved you. You couldn't have known what would happen. The coming months a-are gonna, are gonna be hard... I, I suspect on all of us, but... if it's guilt you're looking for, Buffy, I'm, I'm not your man. All you will get from me is, is my support. And my respect.
- Garibaldi and Sheridan in the Babylon 5 episode "Wheel of Fire":
Sheridan: I'm not angry with you. Not now. I was. .. But Delenn has a .. way of looking at things.. No. No, I'm not angry with you. But I am very disappointed, Michael.
Garibaldi: I'd rather have you yelling at me or angry. Anything but disappointed. I know I failed...
Sheridan: I didn't say I was disappointed in you because of your failure. I'm disappointed because I didn't pick up on this earlier. Disappointed because you felt that you couldn't come to me about this on your own.
- Parodied on 3rd Rock from the Sun when Tommy has to pretend to be a juvenile delinquent to keep up the Masquerade:
Tommy: Why me?
Sally: Well, you're a minor. They'll go easy on you. Besides, we all have to make some sacrifices around here.
Tommy: Okay, what sacrifice are you making?
Sally: The shame of having a juvenile delinquent for a nephew, okay? [leaves]
Harry: I'm not angry, Tommy, I'm just disappointed.
- The ending of God of War III has Athena say this to Kratos when he runs himself through with the Blade of Olympus, giving the power to the humans instead of her.
- In Rosenkreuzstilette, two characters say this.
- In the original game, when Freu asks Tia if she thinks she can stand against all of RKS on her own, Tia resolves to do just that. In response, Freu will say this.
Freu: ...A foolish decision. You disappoint me. If you will not rethink your answer, then... I shall end your life with my own hands...!
- Freu will also say this again if Tia uses up her last life against her.
- Similarly, in Grollschwert, Raimund will say this to Grolla if she uses up her last life against him in the first phase of the boss battle against him.
- In Ink City, Yosuke repeatedly ignores Souji's wishes to lay low and not draw undue attention to themselves, including signing both of them up as the headliner of a 'Butler Fight'. When he plasters posters with their images and names across the City in order to promote the fight, Souji responds this way.
- In the She's All That review, The Nostalgia Chick tells the nineties that she's not angry at it for the bad movies it has, just disappointed.
- In My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic episode 24, Spike was already on edge from being worried that Owlowiscious would replace him as number 1 assistant, and in turn, take away some of the admiration that went towards him, and when Twilight Sparkle finds out that Spike lied to her about the book he was asked to get, she says he is very disappointed in him. Hearing this only drives him into being even less honest.