• During Will Forte's soulful solos in "Personal Information Waltz," Demetri himself can't help but break into laughter.
    • Also in "Personal Information Waltz,"

  Will: Panchos, chasm, other previous jokes, fortnight, fortnight! Fort--n--ight.

  • From his stand-up special "Person": "I wanna put stickers on turtles! I don't know why!"
  • "When someone shows you photos of their kid, what they don't want to hear is 'Oh yeah, I got some photos of your kid too.'"
  • "If I owned a bookstore, I'd make the Mystery section really hard to find."
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