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Cleolinda Jones is the author of Movies in 15 Minutes, which began as a series of Internet parodies and eventually led to a book. The parodies frequently engage in Lampshade Hanging or subverting common tropes. She is also known for her hilarious recaps of the Twilight books and the popular Mega Crossover series, The Secret Life of Dolls (Which has a series page that can be found here.).


Tropes pointed out or parodied in Movies in 15 Minutes or other writings in her LiveJournal


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Yeah, it's like, Bella wants to be a vampire but she doesn't want to be a vampire before she's had sex as a human, and Edward doesn't want her to be a vampire but he wants to get married, but Bella doesn't want to get married unless she can be a vampire, but Edward won't have sex with her until they get married, and then you put the fox and the grain in the boat and you leave the goose back on the riverbank.

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A lot of people are really passionate about these books. Some of them love and defend them passionately; others... well. I'm not going to defend them any more than I'm going to defend Twinkies--you go and get yourself a Twinkie when you have a very specific kind of craving SUGARRRRR!. If you want gourmet pastry, or even a homemade cake, you know where to get that. If you're eating a Twinkie, you clearly know what you want and why you're eating it, and you know that it's not good to eat very many of them, but... you know... sometimes you just want one. And then when you're done you read it all over again. Apparently there are people who think that Twinkies count as fine dining, but... well, live and let live, I guess.

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    • Of course, during her summary of New Moon:
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Where are my lulz? My sparkly, sparkly lulz? MY TWINKIE HAS GONE BAD. I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THEY COULD DO THAT.

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Voldemort: I'm going to kill you, Harry Potter. Just as soon as I finish this monologue. Any day now.

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