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Bart: What if we don't get any footage?

Homer: Then we'll fake it, and sell it to the Fox Network.

Bart: Haha, they'll buy anything!

Homer: Now, son, they produce a lot of quality programming.

[[[Beat]]]

[Both burst into laughter]
"I'm not one to 'bite the hand that feeds me', but I might consider 'biting the network that canceled me!'"
ALF on the cover of issue #40 of his comic book, in which he is eating a roast turkey with colorful plumage
"And this movie haaates the media. Kinda ironic considering what made the Spice Girls in the first place."
Yeah, we can't get in to see Unplugged. Why not? Well I asked one of the vice-presidents here, and obviously I'm not allowed to say what his name is, so I'll just call him... "dirtbag" -- I said, "Hey, dirtbag, how come we can't get in to see Unplugged?" And he gives me this whole rigmarole about how we can't get a load of tickets for you guys, and we only run the network, and we probably can't even count that high.
Michael Ian Black, The State, complaining about MTV not allowing him and the other ten cast members to be in the MTV Unplugged studio audience
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